I promised myself i would write this somewhere...so here goes
one of my education course profs identified herself as "lesbian" the other day; she said those very words
"I identify as a lesbian" in context of what we were discussing ie homophobia in schools. As
she said that, i thought that is such a huge thing to say - i mean its such an essential yet
controversial part of her identity.Rocks should fall, or hugs should be given or something but there we sat about 30 of us - silent. No smirks, no smiles, no expression. And she went on to talk about other things...i wondered how she felt at that point. This is a very "communal" class - there's personal connections with the prof, she's very open to discussion and hearing what we have to say - but nothing. we were awestruck..atleast i was. Here was a lesbian! and she was so "normal" and yet, this was a person doomed by my faith..

Day before yesterday, she had something else to say. we had to do essays for this class regarding course texts. One of those texts were about homophobia. Lets call the prof M. M said alot of those essays expressed how students were "religous" and that they were willing to tolerate homosexuals as long as the homosexuals made no show of their identity - or expressed their love for their partners. At this point M said "this is very hard for me..so maybe we can do this together". And she gave us a line. She said "if your tolerance relies on someone else's silence" there is a problem. She is a very gentle person so my words here dont convey the way she said it..very quietly, very gently. although it mustve been earthshatteringly painful for her to read that people will "tolerate" her..but as she said it, her lips started quivering crazily as if any minute she would burst out crying.. but her lips quivered yet she went on...same quiet voice...elaborating on that statement..."you guys will encounter homosexuals as teachers" she said "there is no question about that". and the lips quivered. "i just want you to think about this" she kept talking- alone. Lips quivering and eyes starting to water despite her apparent attempt to control herself. We did not do this talking "together".

Why am i saying all this? because it made me think. I wish i had the guts to say something supportive to her...but what about my faith? So my faith tells me that homosexuality is a sin.And that there was a whole nation of them that were destroyed - no question about it- it is wrong. BUT what about this breathing, feeling, lips-quivering-like-mad human being? who felt isolated and betrayed in her own classroom? If i dont believe in it, does that mean i should despise people who practice it, some of whom have no choice for theyre "born this way"? does that mean those people have no right to "be"? to express? to live?